A Sandwich With Josh Martinez

Whats in a sandwich? Everyone knows that I still steal cheese. I’m not Sorry. Its something we all have to live with. What’s in a sandwich is not just about ingredients or even about what room you leave the sandwich in when you’re done eating a couple of bites of it and want to watch sports in the other room. It’s about a feeling between you and a solid lineup of condiments and spreads, handsome meats, fresh veggies and strong cheeses (I can’t stress enough about needingmultiple cheeses per sandwich and experimenting with the interplaying cheeses: think Cambozola and Melted Mozzarella or a smoked cheese and a brie) and some bread thats gonna be man enough to take on the juicy heat of a Pastrami Reuben, but not log you down for your dance recital.

I’m gonna hip you to a couple of sandwich tricks i messes with to get you up to Sammy Speed.

#1. Every sandwich can serve as a alt-vessel for food destined for the landfill. Waste not, want not. You got last nights stir-fry and a bagel? Slit the jew toast down the middle and pour the stir fry on your two open faced bagel baskets, cover in cheeses (multiple), little bit of Sri Racha sauce, and hit the pound sign on your telephone for 2 minutes. Hot as it gets and your good to go.

#2. Call up Drizzy. If he’s not at home, search the fridge for something ‘Drizzy’. I usually go with a blue cheese/pecan spread from Trader Joe’s, get some man lettuce (kale, spinach), some strong meats (Bourbon Chicken, Country Roast beef) andslap your cat for not being more helpful. From here, you pour yourself a nice tall glass of Rose, light some candles and Take Care. That sandwich is now a pussy magnet.

#3. This tip is the top tip of them all, and should be done first to avoid needing the other tips entirely. Just the tip? Yes. This comes from the bowels of the Camobear Offices, and its more of a lifestyle choice than a sandwich tip, but the advice to me was Fuck First, then have your Girl make you a sandwich. Whatever she makes is just better, because you just got laid, and your soooooo hungry. Plus she smells of flowers and woman musk and you will be doing her a favor as she loves to be productive right after a round of O’s.

Good luck on your Sandwich Times!